New Year's Resolutions or Intentions?
Bartender's Wisdom... or is it?
My dear beloved customers,
In one of Café 42’s last weekly special, I offered you my insights about the 11/11 portal and the reflexion upon the ending year, what we had achieved and what we wished to experience during the year to come. It brings me today to our new year’s resolutions which, let’s face it, we usually never keep more than a few weeks. Why is that, will you ask me?
I’m tempted to say that they unfortunately are usually actions we take out of ideals coming from the outside, not from our inner self or for personal reasons, matching societies marketing boxes and models rather than aiming to heal an internal discomfort or leave behind a habit that no longer serves us. Our resolutions generally revolves around loosing weight, doing sports, stopping cigarettes, drinking alcohol less... Though some of them respond to admirable feelings towards ourselves or at least seem to, we nevertheless impose them upon ourselves out of constraints rather than out of love and joy.
For instance, if one wants to do sports because it is common knowledge sports is good for the body as we are repeatedly told on every screen we scroll and watch, they go and subscribe to the gym rather than ask themselves what kind of sports they might actually enjoy and why they want to do sports in the first place: is it because they are told so or because they do care about their body? And that semantic difference, my friends, is called “intentions”: why do we do the things we do, what emotions those actions bring to us and what are our inner motives to do them?
So rather than resolutions, what kind of intentions are you going to implement in your life for 2025? Are you going to reorganize your daily schedule to make room for cooking because you want to eat better and healthier, and hence loose a few pounds? If so, are you doing it to be more loved by others - if so, I must inform you that a different body won’t change who you are inside of it therefore the way you relate to others, so you might want to try something else instead - or because you love your body and want to keep it as much healthy as you can? If your answer is more inclined toward the first option, maybe your intention should be to reconnect with your body rather than wanting to torture it with another diet for it to resemble an outside ideal you won’t be able to reach and that will end fillind you up with guilt and loath for yourself…
Resolutions are changes in your life and our brain likes repetition not changes, exactly as our ego because changes come with the fear of the unknown and our ego is designed to protect us from any danger, external and internal. So, those changes must bring you at least a little bit of joy, love for yourself and satisfaction or they won’t last long before you go back to your old habits, with you ego’s congratulations which, believe me, are not rewarding at all and tend to make us very miserable.
I think one of our first resolutions for the new year should always be: be gentle with ourselves. For 2025, I encourage you to find resolutions that will bring you joy, fulfillment and develop your inner love for yourself with intentions that will help you co-create according actions with the Universe to achieve those resolutions. For instance, if your resolution is to do sports, your intention could be “take a one hour walk twice a week because I like to walk, or because it allows me to listen to audio books and I love books but I never have the time/energy to read some or to listen to music or to spend time with my dog or to reflect upon my life…”. Your intention is your motivation, the reason that will make you win over exhaustion, discouragement, cold weather and any other excuse that might come up to keep you from doing what you want to change in your life.
On my part, my first resolution for 2025 is to truly live life as an adventure, see every obstacle, every setback as a riddle to decipher to know myself better and access the next level towards my goal, my dream, in a nutshell, the treasure that comes with every quest. So rather than feeling fear, disappointment and discouragement whenever something unpleasant comes up, I’ll surrender and see it as another wonderful surprise the Universe has placed on my path to help me expand my love and find my true joy. That’s my 2025 intention and I have one year to achieve, or rather conquer, it.
So, my dear beloved customers, without further ado, I wish you all a beautiful year 2025 filled with love, joy and incredible new adventures and would very much love to read about your own resolution list in the comments.
For those who would like to start a journey of love with themselves in 2025 but don’t feel equipped to do embark upon it on their own, note that I am not only a Bartender but also a Life Coach, which tends to be quite the same actually! So don’t hesitate to call on me via Substack chat or my website G-Spotlight to schedule a session to assess your needs.
Lots of love,
Geay
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Results, outcome & Samantha Fox
I love the intention to be gentle with ourselves and create goals that are from a place of love. My 5 areas of renewal this year all center around the central intention to Grow the New to Shed the Old. I will be focusing this on the areas of Physical Wellbeing (I recently signed up to summit a mountain in Canada this Summer for Climb for a Cause), Financial Clarity, Becoming a Skilled Earth Tender (I recently started teaching children outdoor education as a way to learn more myself the process of tending a garden year round), Expressive Acquisition (publish the book I wrote), and Lovership (open back up to the possibility of romantic love).